This is NOW my personal account.

If you tried going to one of my posts, or something, just replace the “vickyardon” with “everlastingpromises.”

XD

5:19 pm  •  21 October 2010

Curtis James McGee. It’s unbelievable how quickly I fell for you. You stole my heart in a second. And honestly, I want to feel like this everyday for the rest of my life. There’s this feeling in my stomach that I can’t bare. It’s like I have butterflies, but they’re with me constantly everytime I see you, everytime I kiss you, or everytime I think about you. I can’t go more than 3 days without seeing you or else I feel like I’m going to crash down. You make me weak, yet strong at the same time. You always make me feel like I’m the best one out there. You make me feel like you’re going to stick with me forever. I love everything we do together. Whether it’s us playing tag at Pizza Hut in Target, or going to the hills at 3 in the morning and falling asleep in the cold with a blanket and we only have each other to cuddle. Or if it’s me sneaking you into my house while you’re drunk from a party and my mom catching us or us just simply singing karaoke at Round 1. God, everything I do with you always makes my day. Even if it’s just us making love at the theatre or us eating China Max at the mall…every minute with you is so special that I cherish every single moment and think about it all night. I use to always think that when people say that they’re boyfriends or girlfriends or whatever that they’re their heroes, that it was stupid and bullshit because they’re not really rescuing them from anything but loneliness. But you, you were different. I wasn’t looking for love just yet, and neither were you. But you rescued me from my low self esteem, from my insecurities, from my depression. You make me feel amazing and like I’m the only girl on your mind. One thing I loved the most about that you did was when we just got back from a party and laid on the bed. You’d think that we were about to have sex since we came back from having drinks. But instead you put me in your arms, you held me tight and you said “You know, this is going to be us in about 20 years. When we have our house in Tennessee, with all of our kids and animals. But instead we’re going to have an open rooftop where we can see the stars.” I was pretending to be mad at you since you were drinking when we said to stop considering you were driving. But at the moment, I wanted to cry. I couldn’t believe you remembered everything I wanted, and the fact that you said you’d have it with me. It made me incredibly happy. But one thing I can’t think about that one time we went out about 2 years ago for a month, and I thought you broke my heart when you broke up with me and cheated on me. You use to flirt with all of my friends, including my sister, and I was stupid for believing every word you said. But we were young. I was only 14 and you were 16. We didn’t know anything about love. We didn’t know what we were doing. I said I hated you and I thought I would never see you again. You liked me enough to come to my school everyday on the bus, but not enough to stay faithful to me. We hung out once more a year and a half later when I was going out with Bernie, and I wasn’t allowed to talk to you cause you were my ex. I was so close to thinking about leaving Bernie for you though, but then I thought about how you treated me before and how I left Andrew for you the first time and that didn’t work out so I never did it. We reunited on June 17th, 2010. You came over my house with a bouquet of yellow roses because I was depressed at around 10pm. We spent the entire night together than you took me home the next morning at 7am. That was the beginning of our romance. We spent alot of time together that I started referring you as my “boyfriend” to guys I wanted to get off my back. And on July 11th, the day we got back from the zoo, we went to Paulina’s. At around 3am, you kissed me. I said I was an idiot for kissing you back because I wanted to be alone and so did you. But we realized we were meant to be. That night seriously changed everything. July 11th was the night that we began again. We thought we were going to be in an open relationship because I wasn’t ready to commit. Eventually, on the 27th of the month, I asked you to be my official boyfriend. And so, we’ve been together for three months since yesterday. Of course, I’m not going to say you’ve been mine since the 27th since you were mine since that kiss. I’m so incredibly in love with you, Curtis. We’ve been through so much together, it’s insane. At this very moment, my phone’s suspended so I can’t talk to you since you’re at work and all and trust me, it’s torture. I want to talk to you especially since your lunch’s in half an hour. It’s tearing me, I’m not kidding. I hope to see you very soon. I love you.

1:33 pm  •  12 October 2010

He’s so beautiful.

6:48 pm  •  1 October 2010

I couldn’t ask for anything better <3

6:00 pm  •  15 September 2010

Oh Curtis,

What have you done to me? We have been going out for 2 months, and that fast, I fell for you. I’m so in love with you that I can’t go one day without seeing you. It’s physically painful. And to you too. You have to drive 40 minutes from your house or work just to come see me everyday & even if it’s only for a couple hours. It’s so hard on us, but we do it. & It works that well. I miss you everday. I love you all the time. & I think about you constantly. I seriously can’t imagine me being without you anymore. <3

3:20 pm  •  15 September 2010

Dear Curtis,

You’re finally mine & all mine. And that makes me happy. But sometimes I feel like I need more. I need to feel the way you do about me. Maybe it’s my insecurities, my fears, and how much I’m protecting my heart. And how I don’t want anybody coming in. You do mean alot though, and I care about you so fucking much. I just love the way you look at me, and the way you can only be mad at me for about a second, or the way you make me feel like I’m not just another girl. Although, like any average teen would feel, I think that I’m just not good enough, y’know? But thanks for sticking around with me for so long. And for not letting me go.

<3 You mean alot.

3:22 am  •  31 July 2010

you’ve been on my mind, since I woke up today.

; You’re always treating me like shit, never care about how I feel,

always gettin’ drunk & high with your friends.

Why should I be the weak girlfriend to put up with this kind of shit?

I have never met a girl who cries so much this early in a relationship.

</3

I don’t want to go through this everyday.

I don’t want to cry everytime you fuck up.

It’s hurting.

12:28 am  •  24 March 2010

My God. Has Disney put an unbreakable spell on us or what? Ever since we’ve seen all these movies, we can’t stop searching for love. Well, what do we want anyways? All the girls I know are very much afraid to fall in love, yet they’re searching for it. What does it mean? Do we want to get heartbroken? Do we want to feel the pain of losing your true love? What’s with us? I believe it’s the idea of us just wanting the drama. We want to create ourselves by falling in love, and then out of it and getting hurt. We’re hungry for attention and by that, we just put our heart in danger. I believe we should just let things happen. Your true love will come and sweep you off your feet. Not the other way around. Boys are meant to chase after the girls. Now, everything’s so different. Why can’t we be somewhat old-fashioned? I think we all have someone out there for us. We might find them now, in 3 years, or 10. We never know. Just wait for it, don’t search for it. <3

12:28 am  •  18 March 2010

Ever had that boyfriend/girlfriend you were crazy about? Ever been in a relationship that takes you miles, that makes your heart soar, and makes you melt? Some of us have, some of us haven’t. To be honest, I’ve been in 5 relationships in highschool. Some were short as 2 weeks, others were as long as 4 months. But no one has ever made me feel that way. Sure, I felt like I was very lucky and I had everything I needed. But it was what I wanted, not needed. Highschool relationships can be so pointless and unnecessary sometimes. I mean, sure dating is one thing, being in a serious relationship is another. You’re young and you should be free and just live the single happy life. You have your school and your future to worry about.

You know when your parents tell you that love makes you mess up in school? I never believed it but it’s very much true. I only go to school once a week and I seriously didn’t went for 3 months when I got with my last ex. It was terrible and I realized it. But I thought I loved him too much to just break it off over school. But it came back to me. I’m messing up in school once again, and I’m single. That didn’t help me with school whatsoever.

You shouldn’t be tied down to something serious. Like they say “Girls just wanna have fun” & that goes for boys as well. The single, friendly life isn’t so bad. You have a whole life after highschool to think about relationships.

<3 So believe me when I say that being in a relationship isn’t as important to you as you think it is. You may just want someone to hold you, or someone to kiss, well we all wanted that. Once you have it, it’s not a big deal anymore. Everyone’s so obsessed with getting a significant other that, they don’t find the best but settle for less. Then it ends faster than you think. Your ‘true love’ won’t be in highschool. Nevertheless, they haven’t created themselves yet. They’re still as well living in the immaturity of young love. So live your life, and have fun. Being tied down in highschool isn’t as fun as you think.

3:46 pm  •  14 March 2010

So, now that we’re over, what are you going to do? Are you going to sell more drugs? Are you going to get drunk off your ass? Are you going to do all the things that I never let you do when we were together? Are you going to be more of an idiot? Are you going to be more of a whore? Think about it. Being with me has changed you for the better. You’re destroying the person you are. I don’t need you, but you need me. I’ll be fine, I’ll be okay. I have the friends I need and the family I need <3 Nothing ever mattered to you. Our four months of love was nothing to you if you threw it away for something bad. You treated me like shit, and I always forgave you. I always came back to you. But once I called you an asshole, you dump me in 4 seconds & hang up. Then you call back in 5 minutes, asking for my forgiveness. You’re pathetic & you’re stupid if you think you can just win my heart like that. You’re not. You’ll never ever earn my heart that way & you never had it in the first place. My sister is number one in my life, and if she doesn’t matter to you, you can’t matter to me. I love you & I don’t know for how long I would but it’ll be temporary. You may run back to me, or you may not, but I won’t ever go back to you until you prove yourself.

3:51 am  •  13 March 2010